Once upon a time, in a land that might or might not be far, far away, there lived a troll. This troll, like any troll, had "issues", not the least of which is her overwhelming anger. Sure she had friends she could growl with, but it wasn't enough to satisfy the pain in her heart.
One day she happened to find the house of someone she could hate. She knew a little bit about this person and it was enough. She settled in under their porch and prepared herself for a good time.
She anticipated so much fun she invited over some friends. They took turns leaving angry, nasty comments for the homeowner to find. But something went horribly wrong for them. For two weeks, nothing happened! They felt neither rewarded nor relieved.
The troll soon realized the homeowner's sister's address was posted proudly on the wall so she crept over and hid under the unsuspecting sister's porch. What the troll didn't seem to realize was that the sister's home welcomes anyone exploring their faith or (and this is the good part) for anyone looking to learn from the many mistakes she made in raising her children.
The troll spent some time exploring the home, and maybe she thought she had all the ammunition she needed when she launched her first round. But alas, shouting recriminations about poor parenting skills or poking at her faith...it made the sister chuckle.
"Why 'yes'!" the sister admitted, "You're right! I'm not perfect, by far. I've made many mistakes. I've wept many a tear and I've learned a lot. I've grown stronger but more importantly I've grown closer to God. Through my trials I've developed a deeper faith. Please, come in and stay a while. I'd like to hear more about your experiences. You're welcome any time you want; I love to talk about my faith. You don't have to agree with me. I appreciate the company and the opportunity to explore and share!"
I'm not sure how this story ends. You tell me....
Dear Lord, I pray for people who feel the need to criticize and be negative in a world already filled with pain and sorrow. Bless us as we strive to do our best, by Your grace. Help us all to love one another as You have commanded us. Amen.
Showing posts with label Is it just me?. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Is it just me?. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Don't judge me, please
If you follow me on Twitter you might have caught the unusual tactic I applied to keep myself focused during the final days of NaNoWriMo: I applied tattoos. I started with the NaNoWriMo shield on my left forearm. 
This proved to be both fun and effective. I applied the first one on November 23rd. Then on November 28th I applied "1,667" to my right bicep: my incentive to get my daily word count average above 1,667 per day (the minimum needed to reach the 50k word requirement to qualify as a winner). On November 29th I was staring down the final words to reach my goal, so I applied a third tattoo: "My Novel, by Me."
If you read my post on the subject you know I'm not taking credit for writing this novel (to God goes the glory!) so I hid this tattoo someplace relatively discreet, over my heart. November 29th also marked my return to the office, ending my week-long holiday.
This proved to be both fun and effective. I applied the first one on November 23rd. Then on November 28th I applied "1,667" to my right bicep: my incentive to get my daily word count average above 1,667 per day (the minimum needed to reach the 50k word requirement to qualify as a winner). On November 29th I was staring down the final words to reach my goal, so I applied a third tattoo: "My Novel, by Me."
If you read my post on the subject you know I'm not taking credit for writing this novel (to God goes the glory!) so I hid this tattoo someplace relatively discreet, over my heart. November 29th also marked my return to the office, ending my week-long holiday. Then began my adventure as a woman of body-art, tats, suburban ink, stain, mystery and intrigue. I was asked more than once about what kind of wild antics I'd been up to over Thanksgiving. I enjoyed the reminders: I am a novelist. I wrote a novel. I've had many opportunities to tell people about it, because the bolder of my co-workers ask.
But there are others who do not ask; whose eyes dart to the tattoos and then back to my mundane visage. They try to make sense of what they're seeing. Did this business woman, an engineer no less, did she really get a tattoo? And what does it mean?
Last week, I went to a meeting with a bunch of stuffed shirts. The attendees were marketing, but also the CEO, CTO, COO and CFO of a small Austin firm. I was privileged to sit in on a deal as it was brokered (the outcome is still pending). And there I sat with my tattooed forearms. And they, of the darting eyes, trying to reconcile the body art with the rest of the package.
The next day I deleted Tattoo #1. It was looking very weathered and starting to erode. Two tattoos remained.
On Sunday I wore a top that didn't quite cover the "My Novel" tattoo; there I was at church, with a bit of green ribbon peeking out from under the neckline of my shirt. Awkward! Again, darting eyes gave away the natural interest. Who wouldn't be curious? I'll give credit to the wonderful people I worship with - my necklace received many compliments.
This week brought a cold snap and a visit from my boss (in from Taiwan). I decided it would be best to hide the body art, but discovered my long sleeve shirts all have low necklines. I decided to rid myself of the tattoo over my heart. My boss left this morning, non-the-wiser.
Today, I boldly bared my "1,667" tattoo and again received multiple comments and questions about its origin. I'm impressed with how well these temporary tattoos are holding up, and how authentic this one continues to appear.
I've kept this tattoo around for a couple of reasons: 1) I enjoy telling others (and reminding myself) that I'm a novelist and 2) I don't want to let myself off the hook. I'm supposed to actually read, edit, re-read, etc. this novel. I have another tattoo left to apply, which is my final reminder to get cracking on the post-writing part of this journey. If I don't get busy soon I may well apply the last tattoo to the side of my throat.
I've kept this tattoo around for a couple of reasons: 1) I enjoy telling others (and reminding myself) that I'm a novelist and 2) I don't want to let myself off the hook. I'm supposed to actually read, edit, re-read, etc. this novel. I have another tattoo left to apply, which is my final reminder to get cracking on the post-writing part of this journey. If I don't get busy soon I may well apply the last tattoo to the side of my throat. I've learned a few things from this whole experience:
- There aren't too many people in my work environment with tattoos, despite the fact that Austin, Tx (in general) is a very liberal, live-music-capital-of-the-world tattooed/pierced kind of place.
- Tattoos are fun and a little distracting.
- I have enjoyed the outward/visible sign that I'm different, but I'm glad it's not permanent.
- It can be awkward to have people stare at my body art (or even just try to catch a peek).
- I've enjoyed telling people about my novel.
- There's just as much risk that I'll come under judgment as a Christian fiction author as I will for having tattoos.
- I've always said I have no interest in getting a tattoo, but that is no longer a true statement.
- I suspect I'll miss having tattoos.
Friday, December 25, 2009
Christmas
During my stay at the Windsor hotel in Kunshan, China I was impressed by the presence of Christmas and all its trappings. When I checked into the hotel their halls were decked and Christmas tunes were playing in the background (specifically - "All I Want for Christmas Are My Two Front Teeth" greeted me upon my arrival).
God knows when we're sleeping, he knows when we're awake. He knows when we've been bad or good (so be good for His son's sake!) and He loves us anyway.
God doesn't come to town once a year or only on special occasions. He is always here. He is always with us. He is always seeking a relationship with us. He's forgiving and faithful, loving us beyond measure. He leads us to everlasting life! He's way better than Santa Claus!
Whenever I called down for room service, I was greeted with a cheery "Merry Christmas" and I listened to "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" Muzak looping through my time on hold. And given the need to put me on hold every time I called (while they hunted down someone who spoke English), I heard that tune plenty.
Finally, I asked a local co-worker about the broad adoption of this Christian holiday. I know that Christianity exists in China but I was surprised to see so many reminders and signs of Christmas. I was curious if there was an appreciation of the significance of the holiday. I was told that most businesses were touting Christmas because of the commercial aspect - there were goods to be sold, they primarily catered to business travelers and tourists.
I wonder whether things are remarkably different in the US. We may be more cognizant of the Christian roots of the holiday but how many families really focus on the celebration of Christ's birth? How easy it is to get swept up in the decorations and the gift-giving!
Something that struck me during this Holiday season was the weirdness of Santa Claus. The song "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" is especially creepy. In the song, we attribute traits to Santa that better describe God. Consider Psalm 139:
Psalm 139
1 O Lord, you have examined my heart and know everything about me.
2 You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
3 You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do.
4 You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord.
5 You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand!
7 I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence!
8 If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there.
9 If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
10 even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me.
11 I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night—
12 but even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you.
13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
16 You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.
17 How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered!
18 I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!
....
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.
2 You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
3 You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do.
4 You know what I am going to say even before I say it, Lord.
5 You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand!
8 If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there.
9 If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
10 even there your hand will guide me, and your strength will support me.
11 I could ask the darkness to hide me and the light around me to become night—
12 but even in darkness I cannot hide from you. To you the night shines as bright as day. Darkness and light are the same to you.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
16 You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.
18 I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!
24 Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.
God doesn't come to town once a year or only on special occasions. He is always here. He is always with us. He is always seeking a relationship with us. He's forgiving and faithful, loving us beyond measure. He leads us to everlasting life! He's way better than Santa Claus!
Sunday, April 5, 2009
The conversation went something like this....
We've been giving Daughter #2 rides to/from church Wednesdays and Sundays so that she can babysit (paid position). This generally requires us to take 2 vehicles (the SUV and the "little car" - not my mustang because no way is the car-seat working in the back seat).
Today on the way from church to her home, Precious G-son dropped his juice bottle. It landed on the floor (backseat) amidst the empty and half-empty water bottles.
D#2: "You and dad have are bad about collecting half-empty water bottles."
Me: "Why do you say that?"
D#2: "Because the truck and car always have a bunch of half-empty water bottles."
Me: "So why are you assuming I'm a contributor? Have you checked the mustang for half-empty water bottles?"
D#2: "Well, I notice there are always half-empty water bottles around the house, too."
{Side note - last week she asked me about my relaxation practices because she claimed I never relax. She cited my doing e-mail while watching TV as an example. The computer and TV are in different rooms. I mention this because, while we DO have a lot of empty and half-empty water bottles in the car, we do NOT have "a bunch of half-empty bottles" around the house.}
Me: "So why are you assuming I'm a contributor? Your logic is flawed. I'm not saying whether or not I *am* a contributor, just that you're leaping from an observation to a conclusion."
D#2: "Oh, I see. I guess it would be like my accusing my husband of leaving his dirty dishes laying around, even though some of the dirty dishes are mine."
Me: "Actually, it would be more like my coming over to your apartment and saying 'You have a bad habit of leaving your dirty dishes laying around' even though there are 3 of you living there. My comment might be based on the observation that you're the only person I ever see there and therefore I'd incorrectly assume that you're the person leaving the dirty dishes laying around. You are a very logical person so I'm trying to help you see the fallacy in your conclusion."
D#2: "Oh, I see. Well, it was just an observation."
Me: "Well, your observation sounded a lot like a criticism."
D#2: "Are you okay?"
Me: "Yes, I'm just wondering if you realize how you come across sometimes."
I'm not sure if I'm okay or not. I'm not sure if my feedback was loving or harsh. Maybe I was just being defensive. Personally, I don't think the collection of 6-7 bottles in the back of the car is any of D#2's business, especially since we're going out of our way to ferry her to and from church twice a week.
Today on the way from church to her home, Precious G-son dropped his juice bottle. It landed on the floor (backseat) amidst the empty and half-empty water bottles.
D#2: "You and dad have are bad about collecting half-empty water bottles."
Me: "Why do you say that?"
D#2: "Because the truck and car always have a bunch of half-empty water bottles."
Me: "So why are you assuming I'm a contributor? Have you checked the mustang for half-empty water bottles?"
D#2: "Well, I notice there are always half-empty water bottles around the house, too."
{Side note - last week she asked me about my relaxation practices because she claimed I never relax. She cited my doing e-mail while watching TV as an example. The computer and TV are in different rooms. I mention this because, while we DO have a lot of empty and half-empty water bottles in the car, we do NOT have "a bunch of half-empty bottles" around the house.}
Me: "So why are you assuming I'm a contributor? Your logic is flawed. I'm not saying whether or not I *am* a contributor, just that you're leaping from an observation to a conclusion."
D#2: "Oh, I see. I guess it would be like my accusing my husband of leaving his dirty dishes laying around, even though some of the dirty dishes are mine."
Me: "Actually, it would be more like my coming over to your apartment and saying 'You have a bad habit of leaving your dirty dishes laying around' even though there are 3 of you living there. My comment might be based on the observation that you're the only person I ever see there and therefore I'd incorrectly assume that you're the person leaving the dirty dishes laying around. You are a very logical person so I'm trying to help you see the fallacy in your conclusion."
D#2: "Oh, I see. Well, it was just an observation."
Me: "Well, your observation sounded a lot like a criticism."
D#2: "Are you okay?"
Me: "Yes, I'm just wondering if you realize how you come across sometimes."
I'm not sure if I'm okay or not. I'm not sure if my feedback was loving or harsh. Maybe I was just being defensive. Personally, I don't think the collection of 6-7 bottles in the back of the car is any of D#2's business, especially since we're going out of our way to ferry her to and from church twice a week.
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