Teens: You gotta love 'em!

It was inevitable. He's 16. He can't help himself. He must transition from child to adult. Unlike a caterpillar whose transition allows them the comfort of a cocoon to effectively insulate them from the world, teens must go out into the world and face the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. And worse, other teens. And teachers. And police officers who pull them over and issue citations (but that I'll save for another post).

What's a mother to do?

Love, love, love! And when that's not enough, love them some more.

I've had to remind myself of this lately. When my teen comes home tired and cranky, I need to offer love. When he tries to reject my love, I need to offer more love.

How?

I write him notes that tell him I love him. I communicate with him (about my day, about his day, about his dreams and plans). I do things for him ("Are you hungry? Can I fix you a sandwich?"). I encourage him ("Wow! That's great! You're really doing a good job.). I pat him on the back (literally).

This post is as much for me as for you. The rewards of this sacrifice are not immediately evident. My love can easily be rebuffed or rejected. But I am determined to respond with MORE not less. I've learned this lesson the hard way.

50% of our children leave the nest, then return???

Yesterday I picked up a book called "1001 Things Every Teen Should Know Before They Leave Home (Or Else They'll Come Back)" by Harry H. Harrison, Jr. It states that 50% of our children will return home 5-6 years after leaving. GOOD GRIEF!

OK, I took the bait. I decided that in the time remaining with our 14 year old, there is plenty of opportunity to teach him 1001 things. Let's see.... Item #1 "Adulthood is not for sissies." Great. How do I slip that into casual conversation? And what do we do with that info? It's not like he can "opt out".

"O.K. Mom, I've decided not to pursue adulthood."

This had better get better or I want my money back.